The Unwitting Sexualization of Children

unwitting sexualization children

Many parents unwittingly sexualize their children because they are afraid of the child having sex too young or being sexually abused, and they don’t know how to take care of their fear. This is not about trying to avoid fearful effects, it’s about healing what causes fearful effects to manifest in the first place.

The root cause of fearful effects is fear, and the only way to eliminate fearful effects is to see that their cause has no basis in reality.

Specifically, our mind is programmed with an “ego”, which guides us to project fearful feelings and then try to avoid them. When the parent dwells in fear over their child being exposed to sex, ego guides the parent to project images that effectively sexualize the child in the parent’s mind, to relate with the world as if the image they hold of the child is really true, and to make agendas to keep the child safe.

Such agendas cause conflict between parent and child at a minimum while increasing the likelihood that the parent’s fears will be played out. Once the child has been sexualized in the parent’s mind, notwithstanding all of the avoidance strategies, the parent’s mind has been programmed to see that the image they believe in is made manifest. That image and trajectory deny the child’s inherent innocence and invulnerability, which causes the child to feel guilty and react fearfully.

To avoid sexualizing your child or to undo what you’ve already made of them…take care of your fearful feelings about your child being exposed to sex.

If the child asks about sex, give them honest answers, but don’t make a big deal of it, or try to control them about it.

If you find out that your child has been masturbating, watching porn or engaging in some sexual behavior, and that triggers upset feelings in you, take care of your feelings instead of justifying them, especially in front of your child. In this way, the child will not be afraid to confide in you if anything feels uncomfortable or scary to them.

That kind of confidence and freedom makes children far less susceptible to peer pressure, to playing victim to sexual predators, or to playing the role of sexual predator. It also protects them from developing a guilt complex about feeling sexual or about having sexual encounters.

If you find out that your child has been playing the role of sexual predator, take care of your feelings so that you can communicate with them. In this way, you can help them uncover and heal the guilty thought process that’s responsible for making them act out as a predator.

If you find out that your child has been playing the role of sexual victim, again, take care of your feelings so that you can communicate with them. In this way, you can help them uncover and heal the guilty thought process that’s responsible for making them into a victim.

I understand that this is a sensitive subject for people, and that’s because pursuant to the ego’s guidance, our mind is conditioned to keep fearful programs protected so that they can continue to justify feeling fearful. That’s how ego prevents us from finding out that there is really no basis for the fearful feeling and no need for ego at all.

As feeling fearful gets healed instead of getting projected, it’s our children who are getting the benefit of our mind’s protection instead of the ego’s fearful program. In addition, love gets extended and harmony prevails between parent and child.

How do you take care of your feelings? Notice when an uncomfortable or painful feeling arises in your body and just offer a little bit of willingness to admit that the feeling is a projection of your own confusion. In this way, your mind learns how to accept healing for your perception instead of using your perception to keep the cause of feeling fearful hidden from your sight.

Hope’s Social Media Digest July 14 through July 30th

Consciousness:

The above diagram goes with this video: Consciousness and the Manifestation Trap

Manifesting:

Getting what you want is soooo overrated since you cannot possibly know what you really want.

Knowing that you really want whatever you get, and knowing how to use it for healing the cause of your dis-ease….That’s something to sing about.

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If it’s more money that you want, it’s really poverty that you are seeking. You cannot want more money without projecting a feeling as if something is lacking.

Trying to change your feeling in order to get more money will NEVER work. That striving still comes from a place of lack. You cannot fool your mind like that. Any appearance of abundance attained this way will surely become its opposite.

Once you get disillusioned by false abundance enough times, you will give up the quest for worldly treasures to accept the treasure that is not subject to conditions of any kind.

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You cannot perceive yourself or anyone else as anxious, confused, angry, panicked, suspicious or sick unless you are making yourself guilty.

Do not ask for relief from the results of guilt unless you want to make more results. Instead ask what’s causing you to make yourself guilty.

When you find out, you will naturally change your mind and the results will follow.

Judgment:

Judgment is impossible for any of us. If you perceive judgment, whether in yourself or in others, it’s only your perception that needs correcting.

Pointing out perceived judgments as if they are in need of correcting makes judgment into a reality for you, which is a setup for perceiving more judgments.

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You are not capable of judgment because you are not the ego.

If I perceived judgment in you and tried to correct it, that’s only because I saw it in myself first, and forgot to laugh. That was my mistake.

If you are looking to engage as if you are capable of judgment, you have my blessing, but not my participation.

 

Ego:

No one has an ego. In fact, ego doesn’t really exist. Ego is a fearful thought program that we set up in the mind to bait us into conflict.

Why did we set up the ego? To keep us distracted so that we don’t find out that the world we are perceiving is only held together by guilt and fear of punishment.

There is no need to provoke the ego or try to change its way of thinking. Ego is not capable of change.

In time, ego will be made obsolete, not through force or fighting, but through gentle recognition that we can allow conflict to pass us by and choose peace instead.

 

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Ego is not in the manifestation. The manifestation is innocent.

Ego is the sinister guide in your mind that leads you to make parts of the manifestation out to lack innocence.

You can have a peaceful and true interpretation instead.

You can choose to overlook the ego’s guidance and be led by the one who can vouch for your innocence and who knows the way back to sanity.

Illusions:

The Divine only knows itself. It doesn’t know your perceived limitations or visions of debauchery.

You are Divine. When you make your perceptions true, you temporarily lose touch with yourself.

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You are nowhere to be found in this world. You are completely apart from it.

This world is projected from your mind and nothing that happens here affects you.

It’s you who affect this world by the way you choose to regard yourself in relation to it.

You can choose to welcome all of your apparent fear, anxiety, anger and sadness as opportunities to bring your light to the darkness; or you can use the darkness to blot out your light.

If you choose to blot our your light, no worries! Well, it will actually multiply your worries, but that’s okay.

That mental condition can’t last forever because the light is within you, always informing you who you are and what this world is really for.

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This world is superimposed between our awareness and our mind’s true reality.

Undoing the projected story of self that causes the worldly veil is our only real responsibility.

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Being is having it all.

Because you took a mistaken thought about yourself seriously, you wanted to make yourself unaware of being, and so you made yourself believe that getting means having more and giving means having less.

But because of who you are, giving actually increases what you have and getting is totally meaningless.

Are you interested in becoming aware of being again? Then notice what makes you aware of being an object, and deny truth to that.

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The most ungrounding thought is the one about the illusory world being real.

It makes you project images of unfairness, destruction, anger and pain and then resist against those things as if they didn’t just come from you.

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The illusory world is held together by resistance, which leads people to seek and find something to resist.

Let them have their resistance. It’s not going to involve you unless you are also seeking for something to resist.

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You are NOT of the Earth. You are NOT made of matter, but thinking you are makes it so, and that puts you at odds with other material objects.

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What’s called life on Earth is based on fear of death. The whole experience is predicated on a desire for death to escape the hidden guilt of having separated from reality.

Everyone has this mental disease, although some are better at covering it up than others. The trouble is that no one really dies, and an apparent death doesn’t release anyone from the pain of guilt.

The solution for our common dis-ease is in healing the hidden self-belief, which can only occur through our relationships, by demonstrating innocence where projecting guilt seems to be the only option.

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Every illusion really does benefit you because you are aware of it, and either you know how to listen to guidance on how to use it for healing the insanity in your mind, or you are learning how to do that.

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A sick mind causes people to drink, drug, or otherwise consume excessively so that guilt can be demonstrated by making the body and mind out to be sick from the effects of excessive consumption.

But the real cause of both illusions of excessive consumption and illusions of physical symptoms is only the innocent mind making itself sick by taking guilty thoughts as if they are true.

Compassion is the key to healing the illusion of overconsumption (whether for yourself or for others in your perception), not making the illusion of excessive consumption true and focusing on that as if it’s not an effect of an underlying problem in your own mind.

Because the only problem is guilty self-belief, healing what makes illusions of problems occurs through willingness to protect the innocent body and mind from being attacked mentally by your guilty self projections.

Self Doubt:

It’s common to doubt yourself when you find yourself not being able to follow the spiritual teachings you’ve been sharing with others.

But that self-doubt is not really justified because what you perceive of yourself is just some errant thought process coming to the surface.

What you seem to have taught in the past isn’t really in the past. It’s being offered to you right now.

You will be able to follow that spiritual guidance when you’re willing to recognize that you’re not really the one faltering.

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Worry comes from believing you are unworthy of peace.

It’s got nothing to do with what seems to be happening. Nothing happens.

Responsibility:

Unwillingness to admit responsibility for all that you perceive makes you into a victim of your own perceptions, which are not just occurring to you randomly.

Your perceptions are orchestrated mentally by you to demonstrate the effects of believing that you are separate from love.

Perceiving fearful people and situations is not meant as a punishment. It’s meant as an opportunity to dismantle the defenses to love that you have constructed out of guilt and fear of punishment.

How do you dismantle your defensiveness to being who you are? Admit responsibility for all that you perceive, instead of trusting in worldly evidence that “proves” things happen to you randomly, without your authority.

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If it’s capable of being threatened, it was never really sacred.

It was only propped up as something sacred for the purpose of seducing the innocent into worshipping at the alter of fear.

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The whole world becomes sacred when it’s used for restoring the mind’s true reality.

The whole world becomes sacrilege when any part is separated out and deemed sacred or sacrilege on its own, because that holds you out as something that can be threatened while giving power to things that seem to threaten you.

The world is innocent and neutral. You decide whether it’s used for self-exaltation or self desecration.

Relating:

No one is capable of doing anything in your perception without your authority. Find out what motivates you to make them out as if they are acting against you, and be free.

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When someone seems to be reacting to you in fear, it’s not time to teach them a spiritual concept. It’s time to take care of that fearful feeling that’s arising in you and projecting outward as if something is lacking.

That’s how we heal together. It’s not by getting people to validate our concepts. In fact, all concepts are meaningless in light of what’s true, and so the truth cannot be shared conceptually.

Truth is only shared by extension from the mind that’s willing to abandon concepts in favor of communion.

*****

All you need is love, but not the kind of love that turns to fear when your seeming needs to go unmet.

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When you seem to be doing battle, are you grateful to the ones you seem to be battling against for innocently playing their roles, thus making it possible for you to play yours?

Or are you making yourself out to be righteous and them out to be acting without your authority?

One way of doing battle cures the insanity and the other multiplies it.

*****

If people seem to accuse you of being out of integrity, that’s not without your authority. It’s like you asked them and they agreed to set you up like that so you could bring that dark idea about yourself to the light of your awareness.


Don’t analyze yourself to see if you agree with the accusation unless you want that dark idea to keep on making painful illusions for you. The proper response to any perceived accusation is only gratitude.

Guilt:

Because the only problem is guilty self-belief, healing what makes illusions of problems occurs through willingness to protect the innocent body and mind from being attacked mentally by your guilty self projections.

Parenting:

Correction of Errors

When it seems as if your kid made an error, and you’re willing to see that the only error is only in your perception, your perception gets corrected.

But if you make your kid’s error real and then try to correct it, the error in your perception gets protected, thus setting up your kid to make more errors in your perception.

All of your kid’s apparent errors get corrected naturally, as a result of you taking care of the upset feelings that cause you to perceive your kid darkly.

There’s no need to control whether you apparently help your kid do things better. This is not about action.

This is about watching your mind. Are you trusting in the appearance that your kid is acting on their own, or are you willing to be responsible for your perception of them?

Your kid will learn what they need to learn faster and easier without you making your perception of their errors real.

So it’s perfectly safe to bring worries, fears and other upset feelings to your inner teacher in order to learn your lessons, instead of avoiding your lessons by making yourself responsible for your kid’s learning process.

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Conventional thinking would have us continue projecting illusions of bad people who pose threats to our children rather than support us in finding out how to protect our children by eliminating what causes illusions of bad people and threatening behavior in the first place.

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Before they took on an apparent birth, your kids learned that they were guilty for having separated themselves from reality.
Their mortal body and its world are the effects of that self-taught lesson.

You can help them and yourself return your awareness to reality through your willingness to protect your shared innocence even when projecting guilt seems to be the only option.

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Fear of death is what causes you to become impatient.

It’s not that your child needs to hurry up or otherwise change their behavior.

You can choose to allow compassion for that fearful feeling instead of projecting it as if the problem is with your child.

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If you feel disrespected by your kid or anyone else, it’s a sign that you’re presently disrespecting yourself and you don’t want to see it.

In fact, you want to project it so that you can prevent yourself from seeing it.

If you are just a little bit willing to observe this mechanism, it will be revealed and healed.

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Your kids cannot really break anything or mess things up. It’s only your mind making that illusion.

You choose whether or not to make the illusion true. One is a choice for guilt and the other for innocence.

When you demonstrate that your child isn’t capable of breaking anything or messing things up, not only do they get to learn about what’s true from you, but your own perception gets a healing, thus shortening time and bringing Heaven closer to your awareness.

What Do You Really Want?

Taking toys away, or using other forms of manipulation (“discipline”) as a means of convincing your child to change their behavior, doesn’t solve anything.

It may seem to affect their behavior and help you feel better in the short term.

But it denies your potential to feel good regardless of how your child acts while demonstrating to your child that controlling and manipulating people’s behavior is the best way to get what they want.

Did you know that trying to convince children and other people to act differently is only a conditioned habit intended to make you feel better temporarily, but that same habit actually leads you deeper into despair?

I get that you may want to press upon your child the “realities” of the adult world, but that’s not the purpose for which your child shows up in your experience. Their purpose is to help you undo the adult-world thinking that’s actually making you unhappy, not to become a slave to that kind of thinking themselves.

In fact, your child shares the same purpose with you,
and you were aware of your purpose as a child, but your early experiences may
have caused you to deny yourself and become obedient to worldly wisdom instead.

The question to consider is
What do you really want?”. Would you
rather have miracles or masquerades? Heaven or the dream of death? Your answer
to these questions is evident in the way you react to your perceptions of bad behavior.

Don’t worry about what you
will do about your child’s behavior. All actions (yours and theirs) occur
automatically and they are perfectly
organized to bring about exactly the lessons you need to learn in order to
restore your mind to sanity
.

Through your willingness to
be aware of what motivates your reactions, you will become so disciplined in
the art of true forgiveness that the thought of imposing discipline on your child or anyone else will cease to have any
effects on
your
behavior
.

What Are You Really Feeding Them

Just because you bought into the idea that food has real effects on the body doesn’t mean you have to hand down that painful self-belief to your kids, as if it’s true.

In fact, it’s irresponsible to make yourself or your kids responsible for what you seem to put into your bodies, and teaching that to your kids only encourages them to be irresponsible too.

Why is that irresponsible? Because you are responsible for ALL that you perceive, and if you are perceiving that one illusion (food) affects another illusion (body), it’s your responsibility to deny truth to that illusion.

It’s Denying truth to illusions, not teaching allegiance to them that heals the appearance of bodies that are vulnerable to sickness and death.

You can let eating be fun again and learn for yourself that all effects are mental if you’re just a little bit willing to give up false responsibility and embrace what’s really true.

I’m aware that this is a difficult concept for most people to consider, for the common person has been conditioned to believe that food has effects on the body, and such has become their experience. But just because you experience something in the illusory world does make it true.

In fact, the illusory world is set up to deny what’s true and to induce you to believe that you are a body that’s vulnerable to effects of the world, one of which is food. In fact, both body and world are effects of erroneous self-belief being projected by your own mind, and those effects are only being projected for the purpose of correcting the root cause. Said correction takes willingness to look upon what caused the worldly effects being perceived, but that cannot occur whilst you are insisting that the effects themselves are real.

Vaccine Deception

I can see why having an experience of vaccines causing harm would make it seem as if vaccines are a real threat. I also understand that healing the root cause of perceiving harm and threat of harm in the world is not for everyone at this time.

Most people would rather make threats and harmful things real and then try to correct them, which only guarantees more of the same. But such is the backward thinking of the world to which we have all been conditioned to have faith in and be faithful to.

To deny truth to illusions takes a certain degree of understanding of what really makes illusions of harm in the first place. This doesn’t mean not doing anything about it, but it does mean willingness to recognize that no one is capable of doing anything at all….That all doing is like a special effect of the mind…convincing people that they do things on their own and that they are responsible for what they do.

It’s allegiance to the idea of doership that’s rooted in attraction to perceiving a world of death, destruction, sickness, and victimization, which we can and will undo.

One by one, each of us will play out our roles in allegiance to the illusion until we can see through it and we are no longer motivated to make it real. It’s only a matter of time, but time can go on for what seems like forever for those who remain committed to making illusions true.

Said commitment causes people to look for solutions in the world, only to multiply suffering for themselves. When the power of commitment is transferred to denying truth to illusions, that when the cause of suffering begins to heal once and for all.

Some of us are in that final phase now, with numbers growing by the day. Anyone can enter, but it takes a certain willingness to surrender worldly wisdom.

My joy is to support and assist anyone who is ready to take that quantum leap. With much love and admiration for all beings.

Understanding the Feeling Effect

This is an advanced idea, but when it’s properly understood, you will never again be able to make yourself out to be weak, frail, sick or wanting without knowing how to heal it.

Firstly, to facilitate understanding, here’s a depiction of the order of things and terms being used here:

Self-Belief (concept of self extrapolated from the mistaken thought that you separated yourself from reality) ——->> Feeling Effect (visceral sensations that demonstrate the consequence of Self-Belief) ——->> Peripheral Effects (thought and thought forms projected outward from the Feeling Effect aka everything that can be perceived) ——->> Fixating on Peripheral Effects supports Self-Belief and the wheel goes round and round

The Feeling Effect is the first effect of Self-Belief. It’s a demonstration of the energy that’s presently being projected outward to make Peripheral Effects. This is very difficult to see as it seems to be the other way around – it seems that the Peripheral Effects are responsible for arousing the Feeling Effect.

Because of the seeming order of things, the conditioned habit is to deny the Feeling Effect and focus on giving reality to the Peripheral Effects as if they caused the Feeling Effect. Fixating on the Peripheral Effects is the habitual tendency and the device used to deny the Feeling Effect and support Self-Belief, which occurs by default.

Peripheral Effects have no meaning and their only function is to keep the mind distracted from attending to the Feeling Effect and thereby resolving Self-Belief.

It is only through embracing the Feeling Effect that Peripheral Effects lose power over the mind and Self-Belief gets healed.  Specifically, the mind can only learn that it’s a benefit and not a threat to release Self-Belief by going through the Feeling Effect.

For instance, feeling like one wants something (better health, more money, connection, freedom, etc) is caused by the Feeling Effect of Self-Belief, The habitual response is to fixate on the Peripheral Effect by agreeing with thoughts that seem to prove that something is really wanted, which supports Self-Belief.

In this way, the Feeling Effect gets resisted and time gets extended to accommodate more Peripheral Effects being made while protecting the Self-Belief.

Conversely, when the mind’s attention is consciously turned back toward the Feeling Effect, the underlying Self Belief gets resolved because it is not being supplied with the necessary energy in the form of thought projections that support it.

Accordingly, the Feeling Effect and Peripheral Effects are denied reality, happiness ensues, and time shortens.

Q: Why would anyone want to shorten time?

A: Because time is only necessary while there is allegiance to Self-Belief. Everyone really wants to return to timelessness, wherein there is no possibility of dreaming that life has an opposite.

Q: Without dreaming, isn’t there just nothingness, like a void.

A: No, that idea is based on fear of death and intentional forgetting of the world you thought you lost forever. The real world is an extension of eternal Life without an opposite and without conflict or the effects of time.

The Choice To Love

Your escape from this world depends on your acceptance of all “others” as your Savior. “Others” includes your body and projected mind (who you think you are).

There is truly no one other than yourself. The others that occur to you are only projections of mistaken self-belief.

Hating, attaching to them or fearing them makes the mistaken self-belief real for you, which ties you to this world. But loving them as yourself releases you.

How do you love all others as yourself? Watch how you seem to feel about them. That’s how the mistaken self-belief is making you feel about yourself.

The tendency is to hide from feeling the effects of mistaken self-belief by projecting those feeling effects onto others, but you can make another choice at any given moment.

The choice for your release from this dream of death takes a little bit of willingness to feel the effects of projecting for yourself.

How do you know when you’re projecting? There is a sense of irritation, uncomfort or pain, whether physical or emotional.

Any sense that denies joy is only upheld by your choice to project thought. It’s a conscious choice, although it’s common to consciously hide it from yourself as well.

Be mindful of your projecting and willing to feel it. Don’t try to stop projecting or argue with it, but turn your attention toward feeling, physical or emotional. Pinch yourself if you need to.

That’s all there is to it. Keep up with the practice and in time all of this will be undone and give way to what’s always been.

Reclaiming Innocence

Because our deepest desire is to reclaim the innocence that our self-projected minds have made into a far-fetched fantasy, babies and unconditioned children are projected into our experience to demonstrate the way.

However, the common adult uses the appearance of children’s carelessness and innocence to teach themselves exactly the opposite.

Specifically, the common adult doesn’t think in terms of the child’s careless innocence demonstrating what’s possible for themselves, but in terms of teaching the child that bodies are vulnerable to sickness, attack, and death, and in terms of how to apply worldly solutions to avoid the different forms of bodily harm that the adult projected onto the child in the first place.

Such is a form of self-importance that guarantees more illusions of frail, limited and vulnerable bodies. It also guarantees that death remains as if it’s the inevitable opposite of life.

Reversing the thinking of the world is simple, but not necessarily easy. Everyone chooses whether to use the world’s thinking as a guide for teaching what they already know, or for learning how to reverse it.

To choose consciously takes a little bit of willingness to go through defensiveness and fear, and admit that what you think you know amounts to foolishness compared to the wisdom demonstrated by babies children before they learn to deny themselves.

Every perception provides a new opportunity to choose again.

One Desire

The desire for anything of this world reflects the desire to escape this world.

This world, which projects from your own imagination is caused by the secret belief that you are deserving of death for having separated yourself from reality.

Having found yourself guilty and deserving of death, this world is a projection of your desire to make a substitute reality and a secret hiding place to avoid certain death. According to your desire, the world as you know it is made manifest.

However, this world is not a good substitute for reality nor is it a good hiding place because it only leads to a seeming death and then another seeming birth, whilst you carry around the guilty self-concept that makes illusions of pain, sickness, conflict, and scarcity throughout each lifetime.

As long as you are projecting the desire to make this world, you are also holding within your mind the desire to escape this world, which causes tension and sense that you deserve more. That tension and sense of deserving more is an indication that you cannot succumb fully to this dream of death because you belong in eternity, not in time.

The only time in which you have a direct connection to eternity is Now. It’s a window of opportunity to undo the belief that you separated yourself from Heaven and threw away eternal life.

The way to escape this prison world is through your relationship to it. Do not permit your mind to hold yourself as a victim to anything you perceive nor dwell on the past or future as if they are not projected from your mind in the present moment.

Instead, remind yourself why you are making illusions so that you can use those illusions for undoing the guilty self-belief that is their cause by allowing your thinking to align with Creation.

How do you allow your thinking to align with creation? Through feeling. If it causes you any shred of fear, upset, irritation or worry, it’s based on a guilty self-concept. Keep looking in the direction of thoughts that resonate with the pure joy that’s within you and provide you with a sense of comfort and relaxation that’s not of this world.

It takes great effort, willingness, devotion, and discipline to choose your own escape from the dream of death, but it does get easier over time and it is worth it!

If you don’t use the illusion of time for undoing the guilty self-concept that makes this world manifest, you are using it to make this world real for yourself, which leads to greater and greater degrees of suffering until you are forced to use time wisely. Either way, you will inevitably choose your own salvation. It’s just a matter of how much sickness, conflict, and death you are willing to go through in order to uphold a world that’s made out of a mistaken belief about who you are and what you’ve done.

No Grieving in Loving

What often passes for love is really attachment. People fall in attachment and mistake that for falling in love because they are attracted to the grieving that follows.

In fact, worldly wisdom insists that people grieve because they love deeply as if love really is something that leads to pain.

But any form of love that can lead to pain was never really love at all. It’s only a make-believe substitute for love projected from a mind that mistakenly believes it has cut itself off from true love.

No one falls in love, but it is possible to rise in love out of the shallowness of attachment to false love.

There is no grieving in Love. When you find yourself grieving, it can be resolved if you simply accept no thought that says you are grieving because of love or because of anything other than mistaken self-belief.

Unwillingness to have the cause of grieving healed is due to mental defenses set up to protect this important ego device which makes love fearful and fulfills the secret wish to keep the dream of death alive.

Grieving is not a normal part of life. It’s what people think they deserve, and so they seek it out through the particulars of their lives and then use those particulars and their concept of love as justification for the grieving that ensues.

This doesn’t mean that grieving is wrong or bad, or that anyone is less spiritual if they find themselves grieving.

Grieving has an important purpose. It presents an opportunity to heal what caused it, thus allowing you to reclaim the kind of love you are truly worthy of.

All it takes is a little bit of willingness to stop agreeing with thoughts that seem to justify grieving, especially when you find yourself in the midst of grieving.